Dating Over 40: Tips to Attract a Younger Man

As promised, here is the next post on cougars. How to attract a younger man. The number one piece of advice is to practice your flirting skills! But I’ll break it down into parts to help you really get it and make it easy to put these tips to work for you this weekend.

1. Smile
Yes this is the same for attracting men of any age. It’s a classic, never fail method to capture a man’s attention.
2. Let your eye contact linger.
Normally, eye contact is best if kept brief. That’s about 2-3 seconds only. But with younger men, linger a bit, maybe 4-6 seconds before looking away. Add a shy little smile and you’ve got the perfect one-two punch to signal your interest.
3. Dress for the part.
If you want to be a cougar, please dress the part. But you can be tasteful too. Choose something that makes you feel like you look hot – and then you will. You don’t need plunging necklines or super short skirts. Just put on whatever heightens your allure for you.
4. Make it easy.
If you see a guy who interests you, walk over and introduce yourself! Say something clever if you’re good at this. Ask him a question about himself. pay him a compliment. Or ask for his help. My favorite was to ask a man to help me get the bar tender’s attention. (I’m only 5 feet tall so this worked like a charm.) It’s an easy, non-threatening entre.

5. Let him know you are interested.
If you think about it, you know how to show interest in a man without saying anything.

  • Toss your hair,
  • Lower your chin, but look up at him through your eyelashes.
  • Play with your jewelry – earrings or necklace.
  • Smooth your clothes with your hands along your body.
  • Lean in when he talks to you to really listen.
  • Laugh at his funny comments.
  • Tell how funny he is or smart.
  • Tell him you’d like to get to know him better.
  • Suggest that he show you how to (whatever he was telling you about) sometime. – keep it vague.
6. He’s still a man – Let HIM ask you out.
Just because he’s younger, doesn’t mean he is somehow different. He’s still a man, so let him ask you out. There’s no need to be overly aggressive. either he’ll take you up on your obvious interest, or he won’t. Accept this. Don’t chase him. There are plenty of other hunky young men so if things don’t work out with your first attempt, MOVE ON. You’ll get better at it and you’ll find men who will want to date a luscious older woman like yourself.
7. The Dating Game still applies.
To make the most of your flirting attempts, follow these simple don’ts
  • Don’t’ talk about your ex
  • Don’t complain about men
  • Don’t complain about dating
  • Don’t complain about your job
  • Don’t talk about your kids


  • Be friendly
  • Act like you’re having fun!
  • Contribute to the conversation but make sure you listen
  • Ask him questions but don’t interrogate him
  • Be easy to please and get along with
Have fun out there! The point of being a cougar is to be clear about your power with men – your feminine attraction. Use it and the make the most of what you’ve got going for you. Yeah baby!






Single for too long, Ronnie wanted to find love. So, she made a few tweaks and then dated 30 men in 15 months to meet her adorable husband Paul. Discovering the keys to midlife dating, she founded It’s Never Too Late for Love to help other smart, successful women find love too! Her mission is to share her proven dating advice  and keen insights about men with women everywhere who are serious about finding love with the right man. Ronnie Ann Ryan, MBA, CCC is a Certified Coach who has helped 1,000’s of midlife women with her Love & Dating Coach services. She’s been featured on BBC’s 5 Live Radio, NBC, ABC, and Fox News, NPR, eHarmony,,, Connecticut Magazine among others around the world. An established author, you can find her 6 books on Amazon.

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