Tag Archives: attracting men

The Law of Attraction: Imagining Creates a Magnetic Pull

The Law of Attraction – Find Love on a Snowy Day

Last week I was looking out my window, as a surprising winter wonderland emerged. Huge fluffy white snowflakes were blowing around, sticking to every pine needle on the tree just outside the second story window of my office.

It was picturesque. So white and clean. So very romantic.

How does this sound to you? I realize that you may not live in a snowy area where the season change. So the question really is, do you permit yourself to have romantic thoughts? Do you allow yourself to day dream and imagine yourself hunkering down under the bed covers on a stormy night with the right man for you?

Sometimes women shy away from such thoughts because it reminds you of what you don’t have. But what if in that imagining, you were actually using a powerful tool to MANifest your dream?

Applying the Law of Attraction

A big part of the Law of Attraction requires you to spend time imagining and feeling what it is like to be with that right man. How does it feel to imagine spending time with your amazing man? What are you doing together? Are you having fun? Are you sharing simple pleasures like watching the snow fall, building a fire or snuggling up in bed to get warm? How does he smell? Why are men so warm?

Is this starting to feel real? If you said yes – yeahhhhhh! The more real your imagination makes things, the more you are using the Law of Attraction to your best advantage. Your brain cannot tell the difference between your imagined thoughts that become memories and real memories. That’s why creating imagined memories gives you cellular memory of feeling what you want – RIGHT NOW! That’s how the magic of MANifesting begins.

Why does this matter? When you have good thoughts and create positive feelings, when you can capture how you want to feel NOW with the right man, this sends out signals to the Universe. It also creates the magnetic pull, drawing that amazing man you long for into your world. Understanding the mechanics of how the Law of Attraction works can help you use this method more successfully.

So go ahead, dream a little and enjoy, knowing you are magnetizing the man of your heart’s desire.


Photo credit: ArbyReed

Over 40 Dating: Boost Your Appeal with Flirting to Attract More Men

smiling-womanThis is a great story. A couple of weeks ago I did a presentation to a group of woman on Your Feminine Charm – How to Tap  into Your Power as a Woman. Honestly, as a dating coach, this is one of my favorite talks. I had already covered what is feminine charm, why you need it,  and some of how to have more feminine charm. The last phase of this discussion is flirting!

As I explained and demonstrated basic flirting techniques, one woman asked if she could interrupt with a story. Nancy said she had the perfect illustration of how powerful my recommendations are and how well they work. “OK” I said to Nancy, “Give it a whirl.”

Here’s Nancy’s Story
She was meeting a guy at a restaurant/bar whom she had only met briefly once before . To be honest, she simply couldn’t quite remember what the fellow looked like. As the time they were supposed to meet drew near, Nancy decided the best thing to do, given the uncertainty of recognizing her date, was to smile at every man walking her way, who seemed like he might be the guy.

In reality, this meant Nancy was smiling at quite  a few men. She sees a guy walking towards her and would smile as a greeting, just in case. Now, it’s important to know that prior to this moment, Nancy was not in the habit of smiling at random men. Especially men she didn’t know in a bar!

That’s why Nancy was so surprised by the results. It seems her date was late, which meant she had that much more time to smile at guys. By the time her date arrived, Nancy literally had a swarm of men encircling her. She was smiling and laughing and exacted by all the attention. And her date must have wondered how he landed time with such a popular and magnetic woman.

Nancy finished up the story by sharing how this was the most amazing, fun thing that happened to her during the entire time she was single. No doubt huh? I’d remember a flirting adventure like that for years too!

The Morale of the Story
This is what I share with all my dating coaching clients. Smile at men! Flirt because you can. Leverage these inborn, attraction skills. It’s your birthright. Your feminine charm is yours down to the cellular level of your DNA.  Enjoy the power of being a woman. It’s something men can’t do! And it’s a way of being around men that will zoom your appeal by light years.

Don’t hestitate to try out simple flirting techniques like smiling and holding a man’s gaze briefly – just 2-3 seconds. Acknowledge a man who you see looking at you and make him feel good because you noticed. It’s really simple courtesy but works like a charm – feminine charm.

That’s exactly what attracts a man to you. It’s not your sheer beauty or your independence, or all the money you’ve made or the high power job you’ve landed, or the sales award you won. It’s more like animal attraction because attraction is a biological function and 93% non-verbal. So don’t worry about what to say or  waste it and wonder where the men are. Work it baby, work it!

Never underestimate the power of your feminine charm. It’s the number one thing you’ve got going for you. Today, smile at a man and you’ll make his day – and most likely yours too.

photo credit:     ndbutter  

Over 40 Dating: The Dating Goddess Asks if the Men You Meet are Weeds orWidlflowers?

attracting men

attracting men

I often read a blog written by the Dating Goddess. She offers a great perspective on dating after 40 – she even thinks its “delicious.” What a great attitude!

How Do You Think about Men?
One of her recent posts asks women if the men they meet are weeds or wildflowers? She goes on to explain that in her garden, they are often the very same plant.  Some she pulls out immediately, while other weeds are actually beautiful wild flowers like mini-pansies, Queen Anne’s Lace and morning glories that grew by natural means in her garden and add to the beauty.

What a wonderful way to look at men!

Do You Notice the Wildflower Types?
Many woman are all too familiar with the weeds that need pulling right away. But how many appreciate the contribution of the wild flower types? Learning to appreciate men, their masculine qualities and what they bring to the planet is a crucial piece for successful dating and finding love .

The “Weed Perspective” Can Indicate a Limiting Belief
If you automatically think that most men are weeds – that indicates a problem. It’s an attitude or limiting belief that men do not have much to  offer, are not good enough, and are not worthy of your time or interest. Certainly that is true for some. Just like that’s true for some women from a man’s perspective.

However, if you complain about men more than you enjoy them – stop and think  for a minute how that impacts every interaction you have with men. I work with many dating coaching clients on this very topic.

This is explains why women who like men are more attractive to men!

To Be Most Attractive  to Men- You Have to Like Men
Energetically, men can FEEL IT if you don’t like them or have disdain for them. And that makes them steer clear and pass you by. That is not what you want. You want men to consider you as a  potential great catch right?

So how can you turn this habit and behavior around? Is it even possible to shift this belief enough to make a difference? Of course it is!

Here’s how you can get started:

Try  Spotting the Wildflowers
Everyday, spend at least 3 minutes twice a day looking at the men in your vicinity. As you walk down the street, go to the store, stop at the post office, eat lunch at a restaurant, look around. Become aware of the men in your space and ask yourself – what is good about this man that would make his wife/girlfriend love him?

Beginning to see the good qualities in men rather than their weed-like aspects is the first step to opening your heart to more men and finding the right one for you. My dating coaching clients who have done this exercise are usually very grateful they made the effort.

phto credit Slight_clutter

Over 40 Dating: Men Are Swarming


It must be the flowers blooming because for some reason in the last 10 days, men have been drawn to me like bees to honey. (Or is that bees to pollen and flies to honey?)

This is not the usual state-of-affairs for me, nor has it ever been. Even at my flirtiest best, I got my share of attention. But not like this.

In the last 10 days, three men have tried to pick me up. I don’t mean to brag, but I’ve got to tell you – it feels good. When I started on my path to find my husband, it finally occurredto me that when a man looks at me and whistles or starts talking to me, he finds me attractive. Recognizing this as flattery gave me a whole new take on my interactions with men.

For 9 years now, I’ve been a happily married woman  (May 5th was our anniversary) and while I still flirt (simply because I can and it’s fun) I don’t have my “love light” turned on. And I’m certainly not looking for any “action.”

What is  creating all this attention?
Let’s examine what might be the cause of this surge in magnetism or my “honey-like” qualities.

First, I am relatively friendly. I’m not too serious or intense. When someone looks at me I do tend to look back and smile. This does make me more approachable.

Second, I never go out without my makeup and do my best to look decent. The one time I said the heck with it and ran out to the store in sweat pants, with dirty hair and no makeup – sure enough I saw three people I knew. I was totally embarrassed! I can’t stand that feeling of knowing I look like crap.  I just don’t go out that way any more.

Third, I appreciate when a man appreciates me. And when they look at me or talk to me, that makes me feel good! So I enjoy most interactions, even though I do not lead them on.

Fourth, since I’m not looking for anything, I appear more confident.  It’s all in being friendly, nothing more.  A lack of agenda in itself can appear as confidence and increase attraction.

But, I’ve gotta tell you – I still think its something in the air. I honestly believe that spring time is making men more open, friendly and urging them on to meet women.  women like me – and women like YOU!

What can you accomplish if you put your mind to it?  Here’s another way to look at it. If this married woman and dating coach, who is just shy of 5 feet tall and several months past 50 can get hit on three times in 10 days – what can you accomplish?

Yes, this is a challenge I am putting out to you. Start smiling more. Put on some lipstick. Wear something pretty. Feel good about yourself. And be friendly! This could be the best spring-summer season of your life if you play your cards right. Now really, wouldn’t that be fun?

What would it be like to call your best friend and tell her about all the male attention you’ve been getting? Instead of  complaining about drivers on the freeway, or your boss being a jerk, or your kids driving you crazy, you could be giggling about the possibilities with the men you are meeting. Which conversation sounds more exciting?

Meeting men is actually one of the easiest and most natural things you can do once you simply decide that’s what you want. Do you want to meet men? Do you want to find love?  Take a chance! Have some fun! Unleash your allure and enjoy the power of being a woman.

Trust me. I can’t be the only woman in the USA, in New England, in Connecticut, in New Haven county who is experiencing this level of buzzing males. There’s some guy out there waiting to admire and approach you too.

What have you got to lose? Go for it!                                   photo credit