Tag Archives: affirmations

Dating Over 40: Create an Affirmation to Leverage the Law of Attraction

Law of Attraction

Law of Attraction

Have you created an affirmation about love yet? Working with me as your dating coach, That’s one of the first things we do. It’s easy really. Here’s how you can do it to start attracting the love you want today.

1. Think about the qualities you want in your romantic partner. Is he happy, successful, supportive, communicative, social, healthy, and a good listener? Maybe he’s got a generous heart, he’s spiritual or romantic? What ever qualities you want in a partner, make a list and include everything you can think of.

2. Can’t think of what you want but sure know what you don’t want? That works too! For example, if you dated a man who was cheap and don’t want that again, then ask for a man who is generous. If you dated a guy who was dishonest, you now want an honest man. If you dated a guy who was never around and wouldn’t talk about things, then you want a guy who is available and communicative. Turn what you don’t want around to be what you do want.

3. Now that your list is complete, take a moment to relax and center yourself. Read the list of all the great qualities you are looking for – this is your MANifesting list. Next, close your eyes and imagine it’s all true! Imagine that you have found each other. How does that feel? Suspend all judgment about whether or not this is possible. Simply believe it is for this moment and connect with the emotions around it. How would you feel?

Make sure the words you choose aren’t too simple like “good” or wonderful”. Think about emotive words such as “ecstatic, blessed, loved, cherished, blissful,  lucky, sexy”. Push yourself to choose words that are very descriptive because this customizes the affirmation specifically to you. How you feel about the right man is what matters most and makes this exercise powerful.

4. Finish this sentence: With the right man for me, I feel __________, _______, and _________. Just pick three or four, no more. You want to capture the essence of how great it feels.

That’s it! You’ve done it – the first step to MANifesting the right man for you. When you choose to work with me as your dating coach, I will help you refine your affirmation statements to get the best results. You’ll see how easy this process can be as you hear the affirmations and feel great when they sink into your subconscious mind and go out into the Universe.

That’s how the Law of attraction works – with like attracting like. So when you shift your beliefs and energy to feel how good you’ll feel with the right man, you are now vibrating at the level you desire. That means you can now attract the love you want!

 Check back tomorrow  for how to use this affirmation to apply the Law of Attraction to your love life.

photo credit: atmtx

Dating After Divorce: Law of Attraction – Why You MUST Say Affirmations Out Loud?

This weekend I ran a workshop using the Law of Attraction to attract love. A lot of material was covered on how to create a powerful, customized affirmation for each class participant. After we completed the process, one woman asked me, “Do I have to say my affirmation out loud? What if I don’t’ feel comfortable doing that? I prefer to just visualize it while laying in bed.”

What a great question!

As a dating coach working with the Law of Attraction (LOA), I have discovered numerous ways to use affirmations. And,  trying a variety of methods is actually a smart way to go. However, here are some crucial elements of working with LOA to be successful. Here are five tips to help apply the LOA for the best results:

1. You need to be comfortable with your affirmation. Of  course it will be as stretch – you are reaching to manifest something you do not currently have. but it should feel good when you use your affirmation and leave you uplifted and with optimism.

2. Customize your affirmation. Make it specific to you.  For example, it’s great to repeat, “I am a man magnet” but what kind of man? Losers? Men who are emotionally unavailable or unfaithful?  Of course not! qualify those men in your statement:” I am a magnet for the right man, a good man who loves and respects me and fulfills my needs as I fulfill his.”

3. Give voice to your affirmation. I recommend to my dating coaching clients that they speak their affirmations. If you cannot say the statement out loud then you are not owning it, you are not embracing it, and hence you cannot not embody it. That means it won’t work.

In order for LOA to be effective, you have to vibrate at the level of what you want – that’s the way LOA works!  So if you can’t say the affirmation because it doesn’t FEEL comfortable, then you miss out on the vibration of your voice which allow the affirmation to permeate every cell in your body. Don’t not skip this step!

4. Sing your affirmations. In fact, I often recommend to my dating coaching clients that they put their affirmations to music. Even if you use the song “Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star” and change the words to your affirmation, it can multiply the impact dramatically. Why? Because singing creates vibration!

5. Try several methods. When you try several different methods of using your affirmation, you will find the ones that resonate best with you. This makes a lot of sense because when you choose methods that feel good, you will do the work more often and it will permeate your being and subconscious mind  that much deeper.

Naturally there are countless ways to work with affirmations that will increase their effectiveness:

– Write them every day
– Make a treasure map to visually represent them
– Decorate a pillow on your bed with your affirmation
– Visualize them in a meditation

When you start working with affirmations, fully embrace them and don’t do it sparingly. The more you work with them, the faster they will work.

You can read more on how to apply seven powerful MANifesting techniques from chapter 7 in  in my book, MANifesting Mr. Right. Get your copy as a downloadable ebook, audio book on CD  or paperback today.

Dating After Divorce: What to Do When You’re Spiraling into Negativity and Discouraged


Dating is not always easy. Maybe you’ve hit a bad streak and nothing is clicking. Maybe you’ve had some disasters or disappointments. This is all part of the "looking for love" process and is to expected. but that doesn’t mean it’s easy or fun and sometimes it’s down right depressing. I know, I’ve been there too.

Just this weekend, one of my clients called me for some dating coaching. Victoria is 44, 5’5" tall, slim and sensible. She knows what she wants in a man and has been making a valiant attempt to find prospects. After about 4 months on Match.com, Victoria feels like she’s exhausted every man in a 100 mile radius and is now officially down in the dumps. That’s why she called me.

"I’m so discouraged with this process," said Victoria. "How can I turn this around?"

Here are the suggestions I gave Victoria on how to change her energy and shake things up.

1. Use Affirmations and Check Belief Systems
Focus on affirmational techniques and assess any resistance to your belief that the right man for you is out there and you will find him. My audio program I Believe is perfect to strengthen and uplift your belief system and out look for finding love. Your faith is crucial for success and will bring you through the rough spots to achieve your goal.

2. Try a different method of meeting new prospects.
Since the Internet has been a source of frustrations, further efforts along this vein are not the best at this time. She can always try online dating again, but set this aside for now. Looking for love with the energy of aggravation and discouragement will not send out the best vibe for attracting men. We talked about checking into the meetup.com groups in her area or even singles dances. Something new is most definitely called for.

3. Sometimes a brief hiatus can be helpful.
That’s up to the individual and i don’t recommend taking off a lot of time. But, if you are miserable about the situation, then go out with your girlfriends and do things that are guaranteed fun to regain your energy and composure. Lighten up to be your most attractive. Desperation is not a big draw, where as confidence that "it will happen" is highly magnetic.

4. Consider a Feng Shui Space Clearing.
You’ll need a professional to help with this option. A trained practitioner will come into your home to determine if there are any blocks, to clear the energy and to improve the harmony for a more fortuitous outcome.

If you can’t afford a professional, you can do your own clearing by using the Native American tradition of smudging with sage. (You can find a smudge stick in almost any new age/spiritual store or center.) In addition, you can lightly sprinkle salt water on your door thresholds and window sills. Once this is complete, then focus on filling the cleared space with positive energy and vibes for health, harmony, happiness, prosperity and LOVE of course.

Change your focus, change your experience.
It doesn’t matter if these suggestions "really work" or not. The outcome will be the same – which is to focus on what you do want rather than on what’s not working. Regroup to connect with your positive outlook and strong belief in love. Shift your energy and lighten up to turn things around and start meeting better quality men.


DAting OVer 40: Visual Affirmation of Love on YouTube

This mini-video is very well done. Amrita found so many gorgeous heart-shaped photos, Take a moment to view and listen to the lulling and expansive music which she wrote herself.

This is a great way to reinforce your desire for love with visual impressions. By watching it, you are employing the law of attraction. It raises your energy to the level of what you  want – LOVE. Like attracts like, so watch the video and elevate your energy to attract the love you want and deserve.

Of course this is not your personal vision of love, but it’s generic enough to work for almost anyone.


Please enjoy the movie!



Dating Over 40: When Do You Hire a Dating Coach?

I’ve heard a lot of people say that the idea of hiring a dating coach makes them feel like a loser. They feel they should be able to figure dating out on their own like most people do. Well its certainly possible. The process seems simple enough: meet men, date some, pick one and get into relationship.

But, honestly, what in life is that easy? I haven’t found anything I do to be quite that simplistic.  Personally I think life has gotten more complicated. So I look for experts to help me navigate the things I’m not that familiar with or don’t have the time and energy to figure out myself. I don’t do my own taxes – that’s for sure.

Today, the MORE.com site has a new article today called Reinventing Romance: When to Hire  a Daitng Coach which shares what a few experts have to say. One guy said he’d be suspicious of a woman who didn’t have enough confidence to date on her own. Oh really? He didn’t hesitate to get post-divorce counseling, so what’s the difference?

Another point made in the article is not to become a "Stepford Dater". I’m all for that. I don’t work with people so that they all act or date the same way. That’s rather absurd. I work with clients to be the best they can beAnd to help them understand the rules of the game. There are rules, many of them unspoken and confusing to women who just want to be straight forward about dating.

Sorry to say the straight forward thing isn’t an option. How would that look – "Hey, you’re cute and earn a good living. Want to date me?" Dating just doesn’t work that way. It’s a bit of a dance, especially when you are in mid-life and have baggage. That’s why I’m here to help.

Beyond the game, dating coaching helps people who need to believe love is possible for them or need to imagine that good men do exist. This part of coaching is referred to disparagingly as "parroting mantras." Yes, I work with affirmations because I personally got excellent results and so have many, many of my clients. It’s hard to argue with what works. (Feel free to try if you must.)

Dating coaching certainly isn’t for everyone. For people who want to find love, are uncertain where to start or unhappy with their results, working with a coach can be that powerful first step to turning your love life around. And it’s a great method to shortcut vs. finding things out on your own the hard way.