Dating After Divorce: Ogling Research – Why It’s Normal to Look

Diane Mapes wrote an article for entitled,"Just Looking Hon’ – In Defense of Ogling." Turns out it’s totally normal to ogle good-looking people.  In fact, it’s been proven through "attention adhesion" research that once you set your eyes on an attractive person, you get fixated within half a second and you literally have to pull your gaze away (compared the regular folks that is) This is according to a recent study in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology.

Thing is women are just as likely to ogle as men!  Dr. Jon Maner, assistant professor of psychology at Florida State University and author of the study says the research suggests that "it’s inevitable to a degree…People’s eyes are automatically captured by attractive members of the opposite sex…"  So if you’ve been known to have a wandering eye – your behavior has now been proved scientifically as "normal."

Of course self-control does kick in almost immediately for most humans who are in a relationship and happen to be out with their partner.  Good thing because this behavior has caused more fights than anyone would care to count.  Looking briefly is one thing.  But comments, whistles, forehead wiping, grunting, gasping or staring are down right rude when in the company of your lover ( and maybe others too).

OK – so we’ll forgive an occasional eye straying session if you keep it short and to yourself.  Hey – we’re married, taken, or in a relationship, but not dead right?  Looking is human and healthy.  Just don’t make it obvious and do come back to reality quickly.  Squeeze your lover’s hand, give him/her a kiss and be grateful for how green the grass is right here.

Single for too long, Ronnie wanted to find love. So, she made a few tweaks and then dated 30 men in 15 months to meet her adorable husband Paul. Discovering the keys to midlife dating, she founded It’s Never Too Late for Love to help other smart, successful women find love too! Her mission is to share her proven dating advice  and keen insights about men with women everywhere who are serious about finding love with the right man. Ronnie Ann Ryan, MBA, CCC is a Certified Coach who has helped 1,000’s of midlife women with her Love & Dating Coach services. She’s been featured on BBC’s 5 Live Radio, NBC, ABC, and Fox News, NPR, eHarmony,,, Connecticut Magazine among others around the world. An established author, you can find her 6 books on Amazon.

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