Do Your Actions Line Up with Your Intentions and Desires?

Elaine is 54, single, and an extremely busy executive with a job that is all consuming. Two weeks ago she went on a first date with Daniel, and she was complaining to me how he hadn’t called. She was surprised and confused to report that he had left a message just that day to set up their next date.

Elaine felt angry and apathetic about the second date. Two weeks was too long to wait and as a woman and a coach, I understand what she means. But we didn’t really have enough information to know for sure what had caused the time lapse. Maybe he doesn’t have the same dating agenda. Maybe he’s seeing several other women. Maybe he’s not that interested. Maybe he was out of town on business. Granted it wasn’t a good sign, but we can’t be completely sure it’s a bad sign.

Lastly, I pointed out that Daniel’s pace was actually perfect for Elaine’s busy schedule. Even if he had called sooner, Elaine was traveling on business and wouldn’t have been able to get together. And, she isn’t sure when she’ll be able to set up the date in the near future due to business and family obligations.

But let’s look past the surface here to go deeper into this situation.

Elaine  insists she yearns for a loving, committed relationship. But, does she have time for it? And does she really want love? Because looking at her situation objectively, Elaine’s actions don’t match up with her desire. She doesn’t have room for a man in her life. And she does very little to find one or free up her time constraints. After coaching for months, nothing has really changed regarding her schedule or her efforts to meet men.


Let me draw an analogy. According to Feng Shui, when you have a bookcase jam-packed with books, that sends a message to the Universe that you are "all filled up" and don’t need any more. That’s the reason a Feng Shui practitioner will suggest you make room in that bookshelf and unload some of those titles. The same holds true for your TIME.

If you are like Elaine, busy busy busy and all booked up, you are sending a message to the Universe that you have all you need. You have no more time, so why send anything else to you? Not the message you want to send is it?

To use the Law of Attraction properly, you not only have to focus on what you want, you have to take steps to find it as well. Elaine needs to line up her actions with her desire and intentions to find love.

I talked to Elaine about her time. How could she make room for some empty space? That gave her a good chuckle.  I suggested she could read a couple of books that had been piled up if nothing came to fill the space. But she had to start creating room in her calendar and life if she wanted to send out vibes of being available. Elaine understood.

In my book MANifesting Mr. Right, Chapter 4 goes over how to make yourself more available. To do so, the chapter explains how to:

Clear your Mind
Clear your Heart
Clear your Closet
Clear your Calendar

These gestures help to free you up on multiple levels and make room for a man in your life.

If you feel any of Elaine’s situation sounds like your life, you may want to start the clearing process too. To find out how, get your copy of MANifesting Mr. Right today. You can start to align your actions with your intentions and that is the surest way to attract what you want in life. Here’s to clearing things up soon!


Single for too long, Ronnie wanted to find love. She put her skills from personal development and her spiritual path to work, dating 30 men in 15 months to meet her adorable husband Paul. Discovering the keys to manifesting and midlife dating, she founded It’s Never Too Late to help smart, successful women find love or live an empowered and magical life. Ronnie Ann Ryan, MBA, CCC, is a Certified Coach who has helped 1,000s of midlife women with her Love & Magical Life Coach services. She’s the host of the Breathe Love & Magic podcast and has been featured on NBC, ABC, & Fox News, NPR, BBC, eHarmony,, and Connecticut Magazine among others. Also, Ronnie is the author of 6 books which are available on Amazon.

Leave a Comment