Dating Over 40: Don’t Get So Emotional! Guest Blog

Find True Love
Find True Love

Emotional Women: What’s the Best Way to Attract Men?

Don’t get so emotional.

Yes, that is the answer to attracting men. They just don’t find emotional women attractive. Unless women can learn to control their emotions, as Paul Blackburn, one of the top coaches in Australia says, “we are just a bundle of emotions looking for a place to happen!”

Even the most damaged men do not want emotional women. Although realistically, we tend to attract what we consciously don’t want since there are still patterns in our subconscious that need clearing. According to the social science research revealed on the ABC documentary ‘Secrets to Love’, people are subconsciously attracted to partners who resemble the opposite sex parent from childhood. If you don’t believe that, think about it objectively for a moment. Do you know anyone who is or has been in an abusive relationship and they were also abused as a young child? Hmmmm…

So for emotional women who want to learn how to attract men, you first need to better control your emotions.

Emotions can be categorized into different ways, such as positive and negative. However, when you look deeper that is not completely true. For example, a certain amount of anger is good whether it be righteous anger such as a mother protecting her child from a bully or as a mental tool for peak performance in sport or business. On the other hand, joy in excess may take you straight to a mental hospital.

The goal is to be able to control your emotions including expressing how we want to feel them, for how long, to what extent and at what time. Twenty years ago I understood this technique as a component of method acting, now it is more commonly known as Emotional Intelligence (EQ). Improper emotional processing can lead to polar extremes – people either get too touchy-feely with their emotions or deny feeling anything at all. Does anyone else agree that neither of those two extremes work very successfully?

There are so many strategies to learn how to control your emotions in a positive and fun way. Plus, there are ways to do a “reality check” along the way to get to the heart of the matter and clear out old, limiting beliefs. Inner critic voices might say negative things like, “No-one will ever love you.” Or “Who would ever choose to love and marry you?” Thank goodness for remarkable people like Lousie Hay who through her amazing work, has helped millions of people to heal emotional wounds. Her book, You Can Heal Your Life, is still one of the best I have ever read.

My recently published book Find True Love has a chapter in it titled, ‘What If He’s Not Interested?’ which has more on this subject of managing your emotions. By changing your focus from wanting a man to becoming the right partner and living a life of purpose, you are opening yourself up to Find True Love.

This month at , the focus has been on the Cost of Dating, including a post on Emotional Cost to Valuable Lesson. Check it out.

Cathy J Elliss is a writer, speaker, consultant and trainer.
She is passionate about “professional and business? development
and personal development with a particular interest in helping
single women Find True Love Cathy Elliss

Single for too long, Ronnie wanted to find love. So, she made a few tweaks and then dated 30 men in 15 months to meet her adorable husband Paul. Discovering the keys to midlife dating, she founded It’s Never Too Late for Love to help other smart, successful women find love too! Her mission is to share her proven dating advice  and keen insights about men with women everywhere who are serious about finding love with the right man. Ronnie Ann Ryan, MBA, CCC is a Certified Coach who has helped 1,000’s of midlife women with her Love & Dating Coach services. She’s been featured on BBC’s 5 Live Radio, NBC, ABC, and Fox News, NPR, eHarmony,,, Connecticut Magazine among others around the world. An established author, you can find her 6 books on Amazon.

1 thought on “Dating Over 40: Don’t Get So Emotional! Guest Blog”

  1. Thank you Ronnie for your friendship and the opportunity to guest post here. I appreciate it.

    And to once again reiterate that you are doing a wonderful job, really making a difference in people’s lives – especially at times when many think that their time for love is over.

    On the emotional topic – I highly recommend buying a boxing bag – to get that anger out rather than suppressing it or worse… having it come out uncontrolled and turning us beautiful women into crazy woman!


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