Back on October 8 on CBS morning news and on the web site, they interviewed Patti Novak from the show Confessions of a Matchmaker – that was on A&E Saturday nights for a while. I’ve mentioned the show before – it was pretty entertaining and Patti does use "tough love" as she calls it. .Direct and right on target.
Anyway, in this article on dating tips – Patti suggests that people try a dating coach if they are not having the success they want! Hooray! It’s nice to be seen and mentioned as a valuable resource. Thanks Patti.
She also has a bunch of dating tips that are to the point and very helpful. The only thing I disagree with is she says to avoid coffee dates and book stores where I think these are good ideas.
Patti may mean to avoid these options for a first date from a matchmaker and then I would agree – because you are really on a first date rather than just meeting for the first time. From the Internet – the first meeting is still part of the screening process. With a matchmaker like Patti – she does the initial screening for you both -so a real dinner date makes more sense.
In her tips about hiring a matchmaker, she suggests asking the matchmaker how many prospects of the opposite sex they have in their data base to help make your decision. I remember asking that questions to the dating service I tried years ago – no specific answer. I doubt many would answer that question.
First of all – it only takes a few good dates so from the matchmakers perspective – why answer and potentially chase somebody away if the number seems too small? And its rather subjective. Who can say what the right number is? But the third point is – they don’t want you to know if they are limited in the man department.
I think the question should be asked anyway – if nothing else you get to watch the response. This will be more important than listening. Because a matchmaker who is uncomfortable with the data base will squirm, blink, move his/her feet a lot, scratch his/her nose or avoid eye contact – all signs of not telling the truth or hiding something. After watching that scenario – then you can think about what the person actually said.
Don’t get me wrong. There are plenty of solid matchmakers out there who are honest and doing good -offering a valuable service. Just be smart and ask a lot of questions before you hand over the cash. Think of it like buying a car (this coming from a car-dealer’s daughter mind you.) Walk away if you feel overly pressured. You call back later to sign up if you still want to do it. You might get a better deal. You might not. But either way, it’s is a good negotiation tactic and it keeps you in the driver’s seat..