Yup! That’s another great tip from Jerry, that single midlife guy I spoke about the other day. Jerry tells me he got sick of Match.com and those other big sites because it wastes his time.
“Women just won’t write back or respond. I don’t understand – isn’t that why they joined?”
Excellent question Jerry, I wonder that myself about many of my clients. I’ve met Jerry and he’s pretty good lookin’ in my book. Maybe the problem is he didn’t got to college – he’s a blue collar guy – but very clean cut, church-going, blonde, 5’11” and he can fix stuff!
My motto is that a college degree won’t keep you warm at night, doesn’t guarantee a good job or much intelligence as a matter of fact. Also,once you go blue you never go back – but perhaps I’m biased…
Any way that’s why Jerry started really checking out Facebook. He says he’s having good luck looking up women from high school and his past and reconnecting with old friends. I think that’s a smart idea! What a great use of the whole myspace/facebook thing.
Why not give it a go? I’ll give youa few tips to get started.
1. Poke around to find old friends and reconnect.
2. Check out who their friends are – maybe you know some of them.
3. Watch the facebook updates and comment on their wall about stuff they write – this is how you get good conversations going.
4. Use your sense of humor! Try flirting even.
5. Update what you are doing on a regular basis – and not just that you are having a cup of tea! Say something interesting or funny or topical to attract comments yourself.
6. Send private messages when you want to talk about something in particular – build rapport with individuals
7. Let it be fun, don’t take it too seriously.
None of this has to take a lot of time. Certainly less than trolling on match.com. You’ll catch up with old friends and maybe meet some new ones too! Please let me know how it works out.
Hi Mary,
Its hard when you live in a small town. However, I am a firm believer that regardless of your age, romantic history or location, you can still find love if you truly desire it. Perhaps you have done all the outer work of trying to meet men, but haven’t done the inner work to make sure your heart is open and your belief system is in alignment ith your outer work to meet men. Give this some thought.
If you find that you hold beliefs like”All the good men are taken or live far away” you might want to spend sometime shifting those beliefs. And make sure you check in to see if your heart is truly open. Once it is, the good men will find you, no matter whern you are! Poke around my blog in the category of “Dating strategies and attitudes” to find posts that can help.
Hello,
I live in a really small town. North Adams, MA to be exact. I’ve tried Match.com, greensingles, yahoo.com, a local dating group Berkshire singles network. I go to local events, dance festivals, etc, Even tried a matchmaker who said “oh of course I have single men in your area” and after paying over $100.00 she sent about 20 matches. None of them were local or even an hour away. More like 1 1/2 hrs. away and the men didn’t want that long of a distance, which I can understand. I can’t move to a larger population because my daughter has 3 more years of high school left. Any suggestions??? Perhaps Oprah could do a dating show for small New England towns for people over 50! I am 51.
Thank you for listening.