7 Tips for Dating an Alpha Male

As an alpha female, you are naturally attracted to the alpha male. You are a successful career gal; decisive and powerful in your own way. You know how to make things happen in the big world out there. Now you are ready to get serious about love so it’s only natural you seek an equal and counterpart – the alpha male.

dating an alpha maleWhat Does an Alpha Gal Have to Do to Attract an Alpha Guy?

You have this idea that attracting an alpha male should be cinch because you know all about being alpha. That’s how you climbed the career ladder and got where you are today. You enjoy being at the top of your game, and the power and prestige that come with that position. However, your work expertise has not necessarily translated into romantic success.

Turns out a different skill set is required to turn an alpha male’s head. You can’t rely on your business savvy. You can’t count on the methods you used to get ahead in your job. When it comes to romance, it’s a whole new ballgame.

Tips for Dating an Alpha Male

  1. Let Go of Control – Now that’s not easy for an alpha gal, but this is a requirement if you want to capture his attention. See, he isn’t looking for a woman to do battle with. He doesn’t want to compete with your alpha traits. Nope, he’s looking for his opposite, the counterpart to his masculinity.
  2. Pump Up the Femininity – It’s time to kick girl power into high gear. But that’s not the same as your alpha brand of power. Girl power is about your feminine allure. Do you know how to bring on the “come hither” look and work it for all it’s worth? That’s exactly what will capture the attention of the alpha male.
  3. Be Delightful, Enjoyable and Warm – A huge part of your feminine charm is to simply be a pleasure to be with. Be easy to please, fun, and friendly. Let your playful side out. Have a great conversation, laugh and let him see how much you enjoy him. Alpha men choose women who make them feel good about themselves.
  4. Follow His Lead – Building on Tip #1, if you want the alpha male to find you attractive, you have to let him lead and learn how to follow. This isn’t about giving up your power; it’s about learning about another type of power. The power of your feminine nature. The power of Helen of Troy who legends say had a face that launched a thousand ships into battle to save her.
  5. Don’t Initiate, Just Respond – So if an alpha male asks you out, that’s great! Say yes and go. But don’t ask him out. Don’t call him to see how he is. Don’t buy tickets and invite him to join you. That’s alpha, and his job if you want this to work between you. At the start of dating, let him be in charge and make it happen.
  6. Be Patient – Dating isn’t easy. You might be wondering what is going on, when he’ll call, and what he’s thinking. You have this urge to KNOW what’s happening. But, if you want to date the alpha male, squash that urge baby. You have got to be patient to see how this plays out. He’s in charge, not you, that’s why he’s alpha at this point in the romance. With patience, you’ll have your own chance at alpha, but it will be through feminine charm.
  7. Learn the Ballroom Dancing Theory of Dating – There’s only one leader and one follower in ballroom dancing, but both dancers play an equal roll in gracefully moving around the room. Are you willing to waltz backwards and enjoy it all? If you want to lead, this is not going to work. Two leaders makes for awkward dance partners at best. And at worst, you will be locked in battle, doomed to constant power struggle with no winners.

Dating an Alpha Male Has Benefits

An alpha male will respond to your feminine nature by wanting to take care of you, surprise you, and lead the way. He might buy you jewelry, pay for exciting travel and order a meal for you. He knows how to be in charge and prefers it.

However, if you cannot sit back, enjoy this and let it happen, then admit the truth of the situation. Come to terms with the fact that don’t want to let go of the alpha role. You’ll discover you’re not interested in dating an alpha male even though you thought you were.

There’s absolutely no shame in this. There are plenty of beta men out there looking for a woman who will take the lead. A beta man is not a wimp. He might be an alpha at work, but is tired of leading and wants to relax at home. This can work really well if you can give it a shot.

Dating an alpha male is not for every woman and the truth is, strong alpha females don’t like to let go of control. Be honest with yourself about what will work for you so you can find the love you dream of and enjoy a life together.


Single for too long, Ronnie wanted to find love. So, she made a few tweaks and then dated 30 men in 15 months to meet her adorable husband Paul. Discovering the keys to midlife dating, she founded It’s Never Too Late for Love to help other smart, successful women find love too! Her mission is to share her proven dating advice  and keen insights about men with women everywhere who are serious about finding love with the right man. Ronnie Ann Ryan, MBA, CCC is a Certified Coach who has helped 1,000’s of midlife women with her Love & Dating Coach services. She’s been featured on BBC’s 5 Live Radio, NBC, ABC, and Fox News, NPR, eHarmony, MSN.com, MORE.com, Connecticut Magazine among others around the world. An established author, you can find her 6 books on Amazon.

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