Are you ready to find love again? That’s what this reader asks – how to know if she’s ready and healthy enough for a relationship. I hope these words inspire her and you as well.
Find Love Again? When Is It Time?
“Dear Dating Coach Ronnie,
This might sound like a really simple question, but I am serious. How do you know if you are ready for love? How do you know if you are healthy enough for a relationship?
Thanks for your help in advance,
Not Sure in the UK”
Are You Ready?
Dear Not Sure,
Well I’m not a therapist and I’m not sure about your situation. You didn’t give me any details in your email, so I don’t know what you are recovering from? Was it…
- A broken heart?
- A difficult childhood?
- The loss of a loved one?
- An addiction problem?
- A health issue?
- A psychological concern?
Not knowing makes it a little bit hard for me to say for sure.
I also don’t know how long you’ve been recovering to help determine if you are ready, or if you’ve been taking good care of yourself and getting help if needed. The truth is, only you know if you are healthy enough to be ready.
Decide to Move On
However, what I will say is that sometimes, you just have to move on. You have to leave the past in the past and go forward. Decide to take a step in a new direction.
I do know that if you think too much about anything, you’ll never do it.
Why is that? Well, the truth is, that’s just human nature. It’s easy to talk yourself out of things, especially if any fear exists.
And because there are always plenty of reasons to fear what could happen. There’s no shortage of the downside to any new direction. You might worry what if…
- He doesn’t like me
- I don’t find anyone
- He disappoints me
- I get hurt again
- It’s too late for me
- My chances for love are over
- I’m not emotionally healthy enough
To Find Love Again, Lighten Up
But, what If you had the same thoughts in a different way? What if you lightened it up and said, “Hey, what could happen? Why not try now? Ask yourself what…
- Is the big deal?
- If it’s possible to find love again?
- If love finds me?
- Could make me happy?
- If it all works out this time?
This is a simplistic answer to your question, yet I want you to take it very seriously.
This NOT a dress rehearsal.
THIS IS YOUR LIFE.
Worry Can Prevent Finding Love
You can spend your time worrying about all the things that can go wrong or not workout. But if sit around worrying instead of taking action, you’ll be missing out for sure!
Think about the GOOD things that are possible! Go for what you want. Don’t let fear of what might happen overshadow the excitement of possibilities.
Take a Gamble – Go for What You DO Want
You have just as much opportunity to find love again as you do to fail. So gamble a little and take a chance.
Hockey legend Wayne Gretzky said it well, “You’ll miss 100% of the shots you never take.” Thanks Wayne – excellent point. If you don’t try, you can’t win!
So, if you want to find love again, go for it – right now! Don’t wait another day.