Is It Time for You to Try Online Dating Again?
Almost everyday, a single woman over 50 will contact me wanting to know how to meet men. But they tell me “Online dating is not for me,” or “I tried it and it didn’t work.” My favorite excuse is that, “Online dating is too contrived”.
These excuses about not wanting to use the most valuable tool to meet people since the singles’ dance was invented frustrate me. You see, I know the women who haven’t tried it are hesitant because of all the bad press the Internet gets. Yes, there are horrid stories about people who have been taken advantage of. But sadly, those are people without an ounce of common sense. Seriously, none at all.
Then for women who have tried online dating and felt it didn’t work, my bet is they did little if nothing to learn about the process. They posted a poorly written profile, put up a couple of crummy photos and then complained they didn’t meet any men.
Does Online Dating Work? Yes, If You Learn How to Use It!
Learn How to Write an Attractive Profile
Writing your profile isn’t like writing your resume. It’s not a letter to Santa either stating all your wishes. You need to understand that this is a form of advertising, so you have to start by thinking about how a man will read this. Most women actually write their profiles as if other women will read them. Then they are surprised that very few men want to meet them. Ignorance is not bliss in this case.
Profiles Should Be Short and Conversational
Make your profile sound like you are chatting with the person reading it. That’s how you capture attention and get someone to read about who you are and who you want. Describe yourself and the man you are looking to find.
Most people make boring lists of things they like to do which doesn’t make you sound any different than all the other women online. “I like walks on the beach, movies, dining out, and snuggling in front of the fire.” Great, you’ve just described the majority of single woman across the US. But who are you? That’s what I bring out when I work with you to write your profile.
Learn How to Take Good Photos
There are some basic rules for taking good photos that will help you look your best online.
1. Don’t use old photos where you cut people out – tacky!
2. Don’t use photos with other women, men or children. They are distractions!
3. Don’t hold a drink in your hand while out at a bar – you look like you have a drinking problem
4. No long distance shots – men want to see what you look like (and you want the same)
5. Please wear makeup, do your hair and put on something pretty
6. Wear outfits you look really good in – something that is date-worthy.
7. Simple is better. No stripes or big crazy patterns. Solids are better.
8. Stand up! You always look thinnest when standing so don’t sit down.
Women complain to me that they don’t have anyone to take photos of them. Really? No kids? No friends? No family members? Then go get professional shots taken – its a good idea anyway because you’ll definitely look your best with good lighting etc.
Smart Emails Get Answered
When you are ready to try online dating again, use these three tips to write a good first email to men who catch your eye:
1. Ask him a questions about something in his profile (You like bike riding – what’s your favorite place to ride?).
2. Say why this has caught your attention (I like to ride too and xxx park is beautiful this time of year).
3. Don’t tell him you have a lot in common – let him read your profile if he’s interested.
That’s it! Keep it simple please and don’t add anything else for the best results.
The point of online dating is not to find a pen pal, email or texting buddy. Don’t exchange more than 3-4 emails before you move on to the phone. If the guy doesn’t suggest a conversation, you can do it. Just say, “Let’s have a quick conversation to see if we click.” Keep it quick too – no marathon phone calls. 20-30-minutes is plenty.
If the man doesn’t ask you out at that point, you have two choices:
1. Ask him yourself – “Want to grab a cup of coffee to see if we connect?”
2. Move on to the next guy
Do not continue emailing, texting etc. As I said earlier, you don’t need a new pen pal.
Don’t Be Afraid to Move On
I get emails all the time from women who wait three weeks and sometimes months, engaging in these ridiculous texting and phone conversation relationships that are going nowhere, hoping the guy will somehow want to go on a date. This is the biggest mistake women make! Don’t waste time on men who are not asking you out or you will never find love. These guys will waste your time like you can’t imagine because you’ll think, “Hey he must like me or why would he text or call so much?”
WAKE UP AND WALK AWAY
See, some men do this stuff, so it’s up to you to be smarter than them. You need to know that if there are no face-to-face dates, there is nothing going on. WAKE UP AND WALK AWAY.
So that’s it, the super quick run down about online dating. You are far more knowledgeable than you were before you starting reading this post. Take these tips to heart and more than anything, do not get the idea that your situation is somehow different. You will not be the exception to the stumbling blocks I pointed out here. If he’s not ready to date you, move on and do not look back. Don’t let him waste your time.
Now get out there and starting meeting some great men so you can find the right man for you.
If you still want to know, check out my Home Study Course – Sizzle vs. Fizzle Online. Everything you need to know is included – like four hours of recorded seminars discussing every detail about how to try online dating and be smart about it.