Do You Wonder What Is Flirting?
According to Mama Gena (from the School of Womanly Arts in NYC) flirting is a fun, playful spontaneous way to interact with men and have your way with them. I know its fun and very effective. Even though I am married, I still flirt because its terribly fun, lightens the spirit and doesn’t actually mean anything.
You see flirting does not automatically imply something sexual. Flirting holds no promise of something more or deeper. Its simply a way to capture a man’s attention or create a fun communication exchange.
First let me share a little flirting story from this past weekend and then I’ll share very simple flirting tips that any woman can use right away.
My Flirty Story
Saturday I had a booth at the CT Women’s Expo. I had to bring my own table, chair, table cloth, banner and stand, books audio cds, etc. It was a lot to carry as you can imagine. As I was unloading my stuff in the parking lot I wondered how I was going to manage to carry everything inside to my booth. As I took a breath to think about this, I looked around me. That’s when I noticed the two men three cars over who had a cart with wheels.
I didn’t spend several long minutes trying to come up with the right words to approach these men. I simply blurted out the very first thing that came to mind. “Wow, I wish I was your best friend.” Then I smiled at them. These gentlemen in their mid 50’s didn’t catch on at first and one asked me, “Why?” I was honest, “Because you have a cart with wheels.” They responded with a good laugh. Then they graciously offered to bring my table and chair to my booth for me.
What a relief! Thank you!
We had a few more exchanges as we entered the building and rolled to my spot in the arena. Flirting saved me! I honestly don’t know how I could have done that myself. Too much stuff and too heavy. I thanked my lucky stars my mom taught me how to flirt. She didn’t give me actual lessons, I just watched and remembered what she did. But, the good news is, I can teach you!
Non-Verbal Flirting Tips
1) Smile pretty. When you smile, you dramatically increase your attractiveness. And this separates you from most other women who have some how forgotten how to smile, especially at men. This is so simple, but the most important of all my flirting tips.
2) Enjoy 2-3 seconds of eye contact, before gracefully turning your head away. (This lets a man know you are safe to approach. Most men don’t like to be rejected and will avoid it at all costs.)
3) You may want to look up at him after this briefly to show him you are checking in – but be super brief about it!
4) Be friendly. Put on your friendly face and be open and willing to talk to new people. Yes, that means strangers too!
5) Be kind. For every man you notice looking at you, there are many more you didn’t notice. When you are kind to one man, other men will see that and be more willing to approach
If you feel nervous or are worried your actions will be misunderstood, keep in mind that flirting is just the next step beyond being friendly. Use your feminine charm and work it simply because you can. Its your birthright to flirt. this behavior is coded into your DNA. Flirting ensures survival of the species. Start to use this lost art and let me know how you do!