This is by far, the most frequent question women ask me as a dating coach. Where can I go to meet quality men? I must say, women often don’t like my answer. Even though its true. My response for years has been – “It’s not where you go to meet men, but who you are when you meet them, that matters most. And I stand by that point of view.
What does this mean?
I ask my dating coaching clients to think about how you behave when you go out to meet men. Are you approachable, with your heart and mind open to meeting new men? Are you friendly, warm and inviting? Do you rely on your feminine charm and flirting skills to interact with men? I sure hope so if you want any results from your efforts.
Regardless of whether you are dating after divorce or dating over 40, this concept is crucial to your success with men. men don’t like rejection so you have to make it easy for them to connect with you. It’s basic, it’s simple and most women ignore this completely.
OK, now, let’s really get into where to meet the men.
First of all, there’s no special place where the really great guys hang out together. There’s no neon sign with an arrow pointing “Quality Men In Here” to help you find those guys. Good men do not congregate anywhere specifically.
However, if you want rich men, try polo games, boat and car shows, upscale steak restaurants, private clubs, golfing, etc.
And if you want sports lovers, you can find them at sports games, at a bar for Monday night football, at college basketball games, etc.
And if you want nerdy men, you can find them at Star Trek conventions, technology shows, in college areas, etc.
But here’s the big news! In a recent blog post by dating coach Evan Marc Katz, he takes a stand for his #1 place to meet men – Match.com and the Internet. Yup, you heard right and he shared some great statistics to prove his point.
38% of marriages stem from work and school
27% of marriages come from friends and family
17% of marriages come from the Internet (although I heard it was 20%)
The first two methods can work and do all the time, but the process can be a lot slower with gaps in between. With online dating, you can meet lots of people if you can be open to it and use the tool wisely. You’ll need to shake off your hatred of the net, your preconceived notions and bad previous experiences.
Evan clearly states in his post that he wants to shake you up and out of your comfort zone so that you give the web a real chance. His point is, 5% of the population uses online dating which produces 17% of the marriages in the last three years. That means this method of meeting people delivers way more than its share of sacred unions. Something to seriously think about.
Please read Evan’s post. He makes a very powerful case for online dating. Evan and I want the same thing for you – we want you to find love and be happy. And we agree, the web offers the fastest way to get started and is a powerful resource when added to blind dates, Meetups, and other singles events and groups.