Over 40 Dating: The Dating Goddess Asks if the Men You Meet are Weeds orWidlflowers?

attracting men

attracting men

I often read a blog written by the Dating Goddess. She offers a great perspective on dating after 40 – she even thinks its “delicious.” What a great attitude!

How Do You Think about Men?
One of her recent posts asks women if the men they meet are weeds or wildflowers? She goes on to explain that in her garden, they are often the very same plant.  Some she pulls out immediately, while other weeds are actually beautiful wild flowers like mini-pansies, Queen Anne’s Lace and morning glories that grew by natural means in her garden and add to the beauty.

What a wonderful way to look at men!

Do You Notice the Wildflower Types?
Many woman are all too familiar with the weeds that need pulling right away. But how many appreciate the contribution of the wild flower types? Learning to appreciate men, their masculine qualities and what they bring to the planet is a crucial piece for successful dating and finding love .

The “Weed Perspective” Can Indicate a Limiting Belief
If you automatically think that most men are weeds – that indicates a problem. It’s an attitude or limiting belief that men do not have much to  offer, are not good enough, and are not worthy of your time or interest. Certainly that is true for some. Just like that’s true for some women from a man’s perspective.

However, if you complain about men more than you enjoy them – stop and think  for a minute how that impacts every interaction you have with men. I work with many dating coaching clients on this very topic.

This is explains why women who like men are more attractive to men!

To Be Most Attractive  to Men- You Have to Like Men
Energetically, men can FEEL IT if you don’t like them or have disdain for them. And that makes them steer clear and pass you by. That is not what you want. You want men to consider you as a  potential great catch right?

So how can you turn this habit and behavior around? Is it even possible to shift this belief enough to make a difference? Of course it is!

Here’s how you can get started:

Try  Spotting the Wildflowers
Everyday, spend at least 3 minutes twice a day looking at the men in your vicinity. As you walk down the street, go to the store, stop at the post office, eat lunch at a restaurant, look around. Become aware of the men in your space and ask yourself – what is good about this man that would make his wife/girlfriend love him?

Beginning to see the good qualities in men rather than their weed-like aspects is the first step to opening your heart to more men and finding the right one for you. My dating coaching clients who have done this exercise are usually very grateful they made the effort.


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