Dating Over 40: How Do I Decide What Advice to Follow?

Do you get overwhelmed or confused by too much advice?  Is it hard to know which advice to follow? I had this problem when I was dating and still encounter it regarding other situations in my life.  Sometimes too much information can just paralyze me.  Other times rehashing and thinking of new solutions drains my energy rather then making things better.

So what’s another option?

First – just stop.  Stop asking for insight, getting advice, and collecting information.  All too often, more data is not a good thing.

Second, relax and breathe.  Then ask yourself  "Of all the options or ways to proceed, what feels best to me?"

Third, sit with that solution for a few minutes.  Imagine how it will work out, how others will react, how you feel when you follow through and take those steps you visualized.

Fourth, check in again to see how you feel after you do the above visualization exercise. If it still feels right – Eureka! You have found the solution or next step that suits you.

Don’t drive yourself crazy by remaking decisions or gathering conflicting advice. Focus inward to determine what will work best for you in this situation. Then be brave, follow through, and do what you decided. I have found this method never fails me.  But, it sure has lifted the clouds of worry, indecision and angst that comes with other decision making processes.

No one has perfect information or totally understands what motivates others.  But you can take good care of yourself.  Stop trying to figure everything out.  It’s exhausting.  Instead, take a few deep breaths, relax and know, everything is working out perfectly.  That’s what a Hawaiian Shaman I studied with relies on every day.  Right now, that sounds pretty good to me.

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